We are nearing the end of week #1 of the state stay at home order here in North Carolina. I am one of the lucky few in my family that must go to the office regardless, essential business and that. I get lots of texts checking in every day, I’m lucky like that. Sometimes I get sweet notes of encouragement and other times I get photos of my doggos or funny memes. Today was … different.
This afternoon as I sat in my eerily quiet office I felt my phone vibrate and quickly checked my messages. The need to alleviate the boredom was overwhelming and honestly I would have gladly been the recipient of a spam letter for something to do. Instead I received a couple of photos from the fam near and far to keep me company.
The following is a true and accurate description of what happened next. This is real life. This is my family.
My darling wife is pictured in #1 sporting her newly designed “Corona virus helmet”. Can she breathe? It appears so. Can she see? Not absolutely sure. Has she been drinking? Probably.
She shared her big idea with my parents in Ohio.
My mom responded with her own version of the “Coronoa virus protection suit” who she models here in picture #2. Very nice, ehh? I was impressed with those knuckle shields. This lady bakes bread and fights viruses in her spare time. She looks remarkably like a transformer and I don’t know if she can even move her tiny legs but I dig her style.
My dad decided to go all out. He is the patriarch of the bunch. He is the brave one who goes to the grocery store and hunts down the items on the list for my elderly grandmother and such.
A true modern day hero. Risking his life to brave the public.
Here he is in picture 3. This photo was taken outside of their home on a quiet mid-Ohio street.
Notice how he holds that sword high. See the extra large sneeze shield at the ready? That cough blocking helmet we have seen before but this looks like its secured. He might be able to actually see. Who would dare challenge this man for the last package of TP at the Walmart? Nobody in their right mind is going to approach this knight in Natty Armor.
I can only imagine what the neighbors were thinking. Actually I can.
Probably jealous of all that Natty Light.
Probably also day drinking and watching these people in the backyard getting suited up in Natty light cases for a photo shoot.
Who needs Tiger King when this stuff is happening on your block.
States apart but this family is making the best of it.
Shortage of PPE? Not when you have creativity and nothing to do but day drink and text each other.
Please tell me how y’all are staying safe.
Show me what you’re doing with your quarantine time in the messages. We all need the laughs.
*no beer was harmed in the making of this “protection gear”
My Idiotic Bliss 