Happy National Beer Day! Or something like that

If you have paid any attention to social media today you know today is National Beer Day. A holiday to some and a simple Monday for others.


Once upon a time I was a wine and mixed drinks only kinda gal. I snubbed my “drinking age adult” nose at all efforts to serve me beer at social functions.

Then I met J.
My beer loving, social drinking sweetheart.

When we met she had, and I’m not exaggerating, cans of Miller Light and some bottled water in her fridge. That’s it. I nearly had second thoughts about what I was getting myself into. I’ve come a long way since then and she has too. Thanks to her I’ve learned to enjoy craft beer and look forward to trying new selections. She now has a brewery date any time she wants. Plus now has an upgraded fridge with food selections and bottled beer. Classy.

We’re lucky enough to live in a huge craft brew area of Western NC which means I’ve had a chance to taste test the best of the best. It’s a whole new world.

For all of you who are still beer shy I offer you this newbies guide to beer.

Try a flight the next time you are in a place you can try some brews.  You can sample several types and find your style. This is great for sampling seasonal beer too. Don’t be too shy to try something new. Even if you don’t like one of the selections you aren’t out the cost of a pint.

A flight at a local brewery.

Ask your server / bartender for a recommendation. If your server is a non beer drinker he / she can still tell you what’s ordered most often.  Sometimes you can even taste test before you commit, just be courteous of your bartenders time. If the bar is full they may not have the time to tell you to stop being an asshole and order already.

Head to your favorite restaurant for Pint Night. These are great nights to enjoy a new beer because you get to keep the glass. That’s right. You can keep the glass. That means no more red solo cups at your next party. You can serve your friends in real glasses. Like grown ups.

Free glassware! Pint glasses from local pint nights.

Try a selection which pairs well with your food this summer. There is something about a super cold beer on a beautiful evening, or afternoon, whatever your fancy. Having a burger? Pretty much any beer goes well with a burger hot off the grill but if you must narrow your choice try a medium bodied Ale. Chicken more your thing? Try a lighter Lager or a Wheat selection. These beers pair well with pasta dishes as well if you are not already having wine. Having a bite which is a bit heavier? Sharing an appetizer at your local pub? Try a Porter or Stout. while my least favorite, these brews have the most flavor and will be a dark, rich beer.

Grab some friends and attend a craft beer festival. There are many, many to choose from in our area. If there are none in your locality you should move. Pack your things and head someplace more fun immediately.Life is too short to be bored.


Still lost on what to try? Lets compare to basic a wine selection. Light bodied beers such as the Lager and Wheat are much like the white wines we know and love, a Pinot or Sauvignon Blanc. There are also hard ciders crafted from a variety of fruit which compare to a sweet Moscato. Your medium bodied beers, such as the Ale are like nice mellow Merlot. The darker heavier bodied beers, which I have yet to work myself up to fully appreciating, such as the Porter and Stout are like the Cabernet of the wine world.



So the next time you find yourself an occasion to have a brewsky, be it a Monday night after work or National Beer Day, be sure to try something new.

Live adventurous. Be brave and always have a DD.

Date Day! Our “not so romantic” adventure to Triple Falls

Today was date day! A real date day not just the wine and dine kind of date (or in our case the beer, wings and game type). The kind of date you look forward to in advance, with a plan and romance and time just for each other.

We decided on a hike to a near by water fall area and a little picnic on a side trail somewhere along the way. We would bring sandwiches and those little single bottles of wine. It would be just us and it would absolutely epic.

Triple Falls DuPont State Forest

Only our big date day didn’t go exactly as we had discussed. Nobody brought the sandwiches, nobody bought the wine. We didn’t even decide which falls to go to ahead of time. The weather wasn’t quite warm enough yet in the day but we still had the convertible top down. We had such good intentions.

Then this happened:

Her: (for the 5th time) ” I need directions, I don’t know where I’m going”

Me: “then maybe you should pull the ******* car over and put the top on. I’m freezing my ass off and I’m trying to find the directions!”  Have you ever tried to read your phone with the open sky glaring down on it? You can’t see a damn thing. I was doing my best, it just so happened that I expressed it poorly and in a loud, possibly hysterical tone.

Her: “Then maybe we should just go home then.”

Me: “Fine.”  Well, that escalated quickly.

It didn’t take long for us to warm up and tempers to cool off. We laughed at each other and headed on to our destination.

Once we arrived we realized everyone and their dog had the same idea. We were not going to be alone. Even if we had remembered the tiny bottles of wine we would not have enjoyed them in solitude.

Hiking in DuPont Spring 2015

There were couples, singles, families and kids of all ages. There were dog walkers and gangs of old folks with walking sticks. There were booty shorts and similarly questionable hiking attire plus backpacks a plenty. I am absolutely sure one group even brought the entire Ancestry Family Tree. There were parents and grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, in-laws and outlaws. Inside one particular group there was also a heavily guarded picnic basket. For a moment I considered ditching my date and joining the clan. We had after all forgotten our sandwiches. and a girls gotta eat.

Then there were all the lesbian couples. I’m not kidding. It was like we missed the note that said “Les Meet! Friday hikers start here!” There were so many. It was like we out numbered the heteros. I’ve hiked these areas a few times and I’ve never noticed this phenomenon. I would have noticed.

It wouldn’t be a big deal except there is this special way lesbian couples of my general age group great one another in passing. I like to compare it to when dog owners with the same breed meet up. Each eyes the other and quickly confirms that their bitch is obviously superior. Clearly. This is confirmed with a mutual nod and smile. It’s a little strange but true.

Even with all the head nodding, kid avoiding and old folk passing it was a great hike. We had a good time and we laughed like we did when everything was still brand new. We even made a sandwich and beer stop after the hike was over. Who needs wine for romance anyway.

At the end of the day we were happy to have had the time together, and that is exactly what a great date should be. It isn’t about what you did, but more who you did it with. I’m already looking forward to next time.

*head nod, smile*

Gym etiquette for idiots. Top 10 things not to do.

I am by no means a fitness fanatic. I don’t love working out, I do it because I have to. If you read my “Why diets don’t work for me”  blog you know why I have to go and why I must go 5 days a week despite my body’s constant plea for an after work couch nap.

The wife and I love our new gym; it’s old, young, fat, thin, gay, straight, whatever friendly, which I absolutely love. The problem is not the gym itself or even the people, it’s what members of said gym think is totally acceptable behavior.

Here are my top 10 things not to do during your workout. I affectionately call this list gym etiquette for idiots.

1. It’s awesome how you can do 12 sets of 100 reps on the bicep curl machine. Honestly. Super impressive. Seriously though some of us might like to work on our arm flab while we are still young. Get your reps in like a normal person and get the hell off.

2. You’re here to work out not play the Dating Game. That goes for the ladies and the gentlemen. I repeat, you are not here to pick up a date. Do not make eyes across the free weights, you could hurt yourself.

3. We all like our jam. Maybe you’re into some ’90s rock or maybe you heart T. Swift. Whatever your preference please for the love of Kanye keep in mind you’re not on American idol. Stop singing. Stop it now.

4. Coffee houses are great for socializing. Gyms and classes at the gym are for working on your fitness. If you want to gab let’s grab coffee after we finish here. Otherwise, don’t talk to me. Clearly I’m out of shape and out of breath.

5. Grunting. I’m not even going to say anymore about this. There might be a time and place but the gym isn’t it.

6. Fitness attire. Why must we make this so complicated? Why with all the complicated options why would anyone wear spandex?

Ladies, leggings are not pants. You can’t wear leggings and a top which comes to your waist band and expect we won’t see more than just your panty line. Once seen we can never unsee it. Put on some real pants.

Gentlemen, I know it gets warm in there but please keep your shorts long. By long I mean with enough length so that the only balls you’re bouncing are the ones on the court. Nobody wants to see that.

7. Mirrors. Some people don’t use them at all (see point #6) and some abuse them. They are there so you can be in proper form. They are not there to check out your newly formed abs. Put your shirt back down and move that egotistical observation to the locker rooms.

8. PDA couples. Love is awesome. Truly. I am so excited for love and being in love that it propels me to be a better me, for her. I do not however express my fondness for her or her body in the gym for all to witness. Yes, we encourage each other. No not with a slap to the ass. Not with a make out session on the weight bench. Not any of that. That is not ok. Stop touching each other.

9. Naked. We all at some point have changed our clothes or taken a shower in the locker room. That is exactly what it’s designed for. Here is the tricky part; no one wants to see your fleshy, flabby parts swaying around. Nobody wants to see mine either which is why it is imperative we all just grab a towel or hustle those wardrobe changes. Just because we are all the same sex doesn’t mean I don’t mind to see your body bits. I most certainly do not want to see you in the nude.

10. This one is the big one. If you are anything at all human you are going to sweat. Maybe a little, maybe in buckets. It’s going to get on the machines and it’s going to get on the seats. Have you ever walked up to a machine with a wet ass print? If you haven’t you’re lucky. If you have then you know how important it is to clean up after yourself. After all we are here to get healthy, not spread our germ juices all over the gym. Wipe the damn thing down after you finish.

I promise that by avoiding these things people will think much less about how much of an asshole you are.

Now go workout. You can thank me later.

Why dieting doesn’t work for me

Catchy title don’t you think? It’s the absolute truth. Also true is that I need to drop some weight, a lot of weight. Marriage has this way of sneaking up and making you all warm and comfortable.  Before you know it you gained 30 pounds and even your fat jeans don’t fit. Damn it.

We joined a new gym recently diet_c_161076and I’ve been getting my tan on. I feel better than I did hiding under my winter wardrobe and I’m excited about the progress to summers sundresses.  However, it’s and slow and sometimes it’s a painful process. I’m dedicated to 5 days a week for cardio and I’m making healthier lunch choices most days. Yay me!

That is except for one little thing. This is where the “diets don’t work for me” thing comes in. French fry Fridays, the best thing to happen to my work week besides 6 o’clock everyday. I can’t seem to completely kick this fast food habit. Even when I’m sick of the choices within my lunch hour distance I still eat it. Even when my cute little dresses call to me from the closet and mock my thick thighs. I still drive thru.

I’ve decided that being healthy should be my goal. Not a diet until x pounds are gone. I just have to be ok to go over my calories for one day a week. Some might argue I’m also shortening my lifespan but Jack in the Box and I have a love affair that not even summer dresses can come between. Until salads taste like burgers there will be french fry Fridays.

Life is too short for diets. They don’t work for me anyway.f_f8009b635c

If you have some great tips send them my way. I’m all ears (or hips … whatever!)

Hey all! Welcome!

I started this blog because I identify with so many of you and it’s about time we got together for a chat. Here’s a little about me to get us started …

I’m a modern day mom and wife. My life is like any other, I have a mortgage and a couple kids. All that’s super interesting but add in a wife (yes, wife) some sarcasm, a few cute dogs, plus a mostly rewarding career and some crazy friends and there you have it.

My Idiotic Bliss (1)

As a disclaimer I’m going to be talking about all of it. I mean it. The good, the bad and the down right ugly. You’re getting the honesty; my kids are sometimes brats, my wife is sometimes an asshole and sometimes I spew swear words like I don’t know any other. My dogs are untrained, my job makes me crazy and my hair is unnaturally frizzy. There are good days too. I’m totally head over heels in love, I live in a beautiful area and I’ve got some great people around me every day.

I’m going to share it all. Well mostly all.

No shame or regrets, after all this is my idiotic bliss.

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